Friday, March 11, 2011

don't know

I don't know whats going on with me, but I feel blah. I don't have a job even though I have sent out what feels like hundreds of applications.  I have an interview at Target on Monday, it's not what I want to do with my life, but at least for now it would be money coming in.  Now I just hope I get it, I want to be working, I want to feel like a productive member of society, I want to have money, even though it will all be going to paying back student loans that are pretty much worthless to me now. I wish I would have been able to speak my mind before I started school, then I wouldn't have these freaking loans.

Sometimes I feel about as tall as an ant. I feel worthless, I feel stupid, I feel like a lump.  I know I am not the only one, and I know I'm not it just sucks that it's so hard to come out of this funk.  Any advice, what do you do when you get like this? I think I am going to go have some wine.  Tomorrow is the St. Pat's parade, maybe that will help pull me out, some good time with friends.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Mentor Couple

If you will recall from one of my previous posts one of the requirements to get married at my church requires us to meet with a mentor couple a few times before our ceremony.  We had our first meeting with Bill and Debbie last night.  I was so nervous going in, I was afraid they were going to tell us our problems were so bad we shouldn't get married.  I was shaking and having a hard time breathing, Mark had to calm me down before we rang the doorbell. 

When they let us in we sat down and just talked for a few minutes and it really calmed me down.  They made us a YUMMY dinner of salad, ravioli, and brownies with mixed berries on top. During dinner we just got to know them a little better and talked about us a little.

After dinner they gave us a little survey to fill out, about what we really want to talk about ranging from communication, finances, conflict/resolution, god, and sex.  They said we weren't much different in what we wanted to/felt we needed to talk than different couples they have met with.  And they said they have never recommend a couple not get married. WHEW! We started talking a little about communication and conflict resolution last night.  Just from the few minutes we discussed it last night I can tell this is really going to be a positive for us and our relationship.  I am looking forward to where this is going!