ARGHH

So I just talked to Mark and the broker called him and we won't hear anything until tomorrow, I really don't know if I can wait that long to know. My lower lip is going to be gone because I chew it when I get nervous. ARGHHHH

Freaking out

Ok so my parents were looking for a house for my twin brother and his fiance, in their searching they found a house that would be perfect for Mark and I. It needs some work and it's listed for $109,900 which on 3 acres of land with a barn, stables, two car garage and two other outbuildings and three bed three bath house isn't bad at all! So today we called a mortgage broker to see about getting pre-approved and I am freaking out waiting to hear back from her. What if we don't get it? What if they laugh at us and say no way in HE double hockey sticks are we gonna give you a home loan. I was so nervous calling the lady today that I had to call my mom and talk to her before I called this lady and my mom pretty much said ok i am going to hang up and you ARE going to call her, then call me back so I know you did it. It was horrible!!! And now I am trying to study while I wait to hear back...YEA RIGHT!!! I'm just soo nervous what if they say no, or what if they say yes! ARGHHHHHH How did you all handle this, because I am a wreck and I can't stay like this and hope t be a functioning member of society!

WOW

OKOK I know I've been away for awhile, and I am sorry! But it's for a good reason, I've been studying my booty off! And I have seen soooo much improvement in my score! Not enough yet but enough for me to be able to see an end to this sometime! I can't wait for that day! Once I pass this stupid test I can actually start clinicals and be in the hospitals and I can start to plan my wedding! WOOHOO i can't wait!!! I'm heading home on Thursday the 9th, I can't wait to see everyone. my mommy is coming up here on Monday and I am going to take her around KC and then she is going to ride home with me so I don't need to be by myself. I think Mark is pretty darn excited about me coming home even though I won't get to see him too much because I am still going to be closed off in a dark cave somewhere studying. Sorry my life isn't more interesting right now...

Oh but I did find an awesome giveaway for you all to enter! Its at girlsinc She is giving away an awesome get ready for summer kit! It has OPI nailpolish, a wine glass, lemonade mix, sunglasses and incredibly cute towel! It's just awesome, so head over and check it out!

And for my what am I studying today:
Mu opiod analgesic such as morphine can cause a contraction and spasm of the sphincter of odi causing intense pain in the gallbladder. Interesting huh?

Very busy

Hey all, sorry about not updating more than I have been. But this studying for the Step 1 thing kinda gets in the way, hope you can understand that. Kansas City is a gorgeous city! I live about a mile from the plaza so I am there rather often. There has been some drama with the program but it's getting better and I am slowly seeing a rise in my scores, now I'm just getting impatient for the big jump I need to see.

I've been seeing a counselor about my anxiety problems and we may have found the root of them, one Mr. David Scupham. He was my advisor at Valpo and the first time he ever met me he told me to give up on my dream of ever being a doctor, that I wouldn't make it. He was the first person who ever told me I couldn't do what I wanted and apparently that scared me alot deeper than I thought. So I am working through it.

Mark and Cub came up for Valentines day, Mark and i went to a really nice dinner at "Jack Stacks BBQ" then we walked around the plaza and came back to the apartment and played with cubby. On Sunday Cub and my roomates dog Byron got to meet and play to together. He is 100 lbs heavier than her but they got along great and played really well together!

Yesterday i had some really yummy BBQ from a place called "Oklahome Joe's" it's a BBQ restraunt in a gas station. I was skeptical but it was delicious! That might be all for now...really all i do is study my life is boring right now.

Oh yea, what am I studying right now? The Alveolar-Blood gas exchange. The first paragraph n the page I am reading now is: Pgas=Fgas x Patm. By convention the partial pressure of the gas is expressed in terms of it's dry gas concentration. Example the PO2 in ambient air: Po2=0.21 x 760=160 mmHg

Fun stuff huh??? I know you are jealous you don't get to read anymore and I do!

Giveaways

Hey all,

Just a quick post to say I heard about a few giveaways and i wanted to share with all of you!
Hope you hop on over and check them out:

Win a free blog makeover from the wonderfully talented Blogs by Danielle

And then jump over to Monogram Chick and check out the incredibly cute aqua-dot coffee mug she is giving away!!

Enjoy and hopefully one of us wins!!

I'll try to make a more substantial post tomorrow!

Feeling better

So I think I was just really PMSing or something yesterday, I feel MUCH better today. So now that I have a sunny outlook on life again it's time to get back into studying and cut myself off from the computer again. I'll check my google reader during my breaks but I most likely won't post again until this weekend, unless something really good happens. But for now it's back to my Path notes and reviewing about cell death and inflammation. If I get really bored later I might gie you all a glimpse into what I am studying...actually that might be a fun little weekly thing, type up a page of my notes so you know what I am doing...I'll have to think about it a little more. Let me know if you think it sounds interesting, or just incredibly nerdish of me! But for now I leave you with this...

Bad day

UCK...I'm having a bad day and I've only been up for an hour. I feel like crap, weak and tired my head hurts. I didn't want to get out of bed but I need to study. Then I got annoyed at Mark because he didn't answer the phone last night when I tried to call. We almost never get to talk and then when I do try to call he can't even wake up to answer the phone, added onto me not feeling well= not good conversation. So really I just want to crawl back into bed and forget this day ever happened. Maybe I'll just curl up with Anthony and cry for a minute, that might help. This is the time when I really really really miss tibs, he would have curle up with me and made me feel better.

Anyway hopefully this will bring a smile to your face today: